The Bart File


Originally by Dave Hall
Contributions from Ben Collins
Maintained by Wesley Mead

"I didn't think it was physically possible, but this both sucks and blows. "

{Credit is usually given to the first person to point out an observation}

A "Thanks!" to Sam B and Martin James, who have offered many a contribution to this page. They account for much of the information and quotes.

"$" indicates that the scene was cut in syndication

    Table of Contents:

  1. Age
  2. Bart Episodes
  3. Bart Subplots
  4. Bart Treehouse Of Horror Segments
  5. Bart Ullman Shorts
  6. Baring Butt
  7. Dressed Up
  8. Featuring Slingshot
  9. Featuring Lucky Red Hat
  10. Flashbacks
  11. A Glimpse Of The Future / Possible Career Paths
  12. Featuring Skateboard
  13. Bonding with Lisa
  14. Pranks
  15. Misc Tidbits
  16. Ay Caramba! Count
  17. El Barto Count
  18. Get Bent Count
  19. Eat My Shorts Count
  20. Don't Have a Cow Count
  21. Important Events
  22. D'oh Count
  23. Birthday Count
  24. Butt Pranks


  • [7F07] ..."between the ages of nine and eleven"
  • [8F03] Burns states his age is ten
  • [8F11] Celebrates his tenth birthday
  • [2F17] Age is written on the wall where he measures his height each birthday

    Bart Episodes

  • [7G02] Bart the Genius
  • [7G05] Bart the General
  • [7F07] The Telltale Head
  • [7G11] The Crepes of Wrath
  • [7F03] Bart Gets An F
  • [7F07] Bart Vs. Thanksgiving
  • [7F06] Bart the Daredevil
  • [7F08] Dead Putting Society {sb}
  • [7F10] Bart Gets Hit By A Car {sb}
  • [7F21] Three Men and a Comic Book
  • [8F03] Bart The Murderer
  • [8F11] Radio Bart
  • [8F16] Bart the Lover
  • [8F20] Black Widower
  • [8F22] Bart's Friend Falls In Love
  • [8F24] Kamp Krusty
  • [9F03] Itchy and Scratchy: The Movie
  • [9F06] New Kid on the Block
  • [9F12] Brother from the Same Planet
  • [9F22] Cape Feare
  • [1F05] Bart's Inner Child
  • [1F06] Boy Scoutz N the Hood
  • [1F11] Bart Gets Famous {as}
  • [1F15] Bart Gets An Elephant
  • [1F16] Burns' Heir {sb}
  • [1F18] Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song
  • [1F19] The Boy Who Knew Too Much {as}
  • [1F22] Bart of Darkness
  • [2F04] Bart's Girlfriend
  • [2F11] Bart's Comet
  • [2F13] Bart vs. Australia
  • [2F22] Lemon of Troy
  • [2F17] Radioactive Man
  • [3F02] Bart Sells His Soul
  • [3F07] Marge Be Not Proud
  • [3F12] Bart the Fink
  • [3F17] Bart on the Road
  • [4F06] Bart After Dark
  • [4F13] My Sister, My Sitter
  • [4F09] Grade School Confidential
  • [5F03] Bart Star
  • [5F07] Miracle on Evergreen Terrace
  • [5F11] Das Bus {sb}
  • [5F13] This Little Wiggy
  • [5F22] Bart the Mother
  • [AABF07] Wild Barts Can't Be Broken
  • [AABF16] The Old Man and the "C" Student
  • [AABF22] Brother's Little Helper
  • [BABF06] Faith Off
  • [BABF13] Bart To The Future
  • [CABF03] The Great Money Caper {sb}
  • [CABF08] Worst Episode Ever
  • [CABF12] New Kids On the Blecch {sb}
  • [CABF22] The Parent Rap {sb}
  • [DABF06] The Bart Wants What It Wants
  • [DABF13] I am Furious Yellow
  • [DABF20] Bart Vs. Lisa Vs. Third Grade
  • [EABF05] Barting Over
  • [EABF16] The Bart Of War
  • [FABF07] Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore {sb}
  • [FABF11] The Wandering Juvie
  • [FABF17] Bart-Mangled Banner
  • [FABF20] All's Fair In Oven War
  • [FABF21] Fat Man and Little Boy {sb}
  • [GABF12] Future-Drama
  • [GABF11] The Heartbroke Kid
  • [GABF09] The Father, the Son and the Holy Guest Star
  • [GABF20] Marge's Son Poisoning
  • [HABF04] We're On The Road to D'oh-where
  • [HABF07] Bart Has Two Mommies
  • [HABF18] Jazzy and the Pussycats
  • [JABF02] The Haw-Hawed Couple
  • [JABF11] The Boys of Bummer
  • [KABF01] Funeral for a Fiend
  • [KABF06] The Debarted
  • [KABF10] Apocalypse Cow
  • [KABF15] Lost Verizon
  • [KABF14] Double, Double, Boy In Trouble

Please note that capsule links for seasons 13+ may not yet be available.

    Bart Subplots

  • [7G06] Dukes it out with Homer in video boxing
  • [7G10] Orders spy camera, catches Homer dancing with Princess Kashmir
  • [7G01] Traps the Babysitter Bandit {sb}
  • [7F19] Runs for class president
  • [7F20] Takes advantage of Grampa {sb}
  • [7F22] Donates blood to Mr. Burns
  • [7F23] Supposedly learns karate; actually plays video games
  • [8F04] Can't play with Milhouse
  • [8F12] Marge forces him to wear "uncool" clothing
  • [8F19] Forced to stay at Patty & Selma's house when Marge goes on holiday {sb}
  • [9F05] "Cries wolf"; fakes various illnesses
  • [9F14] Featured in Lisa's "Is My Brother Dumber Than a Hamster?" experiment {sb}
  • [9F18] Expelled from school
  • [1F07] Dr. Hibbert's HMO gives him glasses, prescription shoes and hair salve, turning him into a nerd
  • [1F08] Starts up his own casino {sb}
  • [2F07] believes there are UFO's in Springfield
  • [2F14] Discovers ballet
  • [2F32] Has appendix removed due to swallowing a metal Krusty-O
  • [3F23] Put into a remedial class {sb}
  • [4F19] Buys a factory at an auction
  • [3G04] Boys' earrings are all the rage at Springfield Elementary
  • [5F17] Glues joke-shop items to his face
  • [5F18] He and Lisa discover an alternate ending to Casablanca
  • [5F20] Starts up grease business with Homer; misses school {sb}
  • [AABF11] Gets Marge to make his digestive system model
  • [BABF09] Enters Duncan (Furious D) in various races {sb}
  • [BABF14] He and Lisa go out to take a photo for Springfield's phonebook {sb}
  • [CABF01] Saves up for a new games console
  • [CABF22] is chained to Homer as punishment from Judge Harm
  • [DABF07] helps save Buck McCoy's career
  • [DABF15] Diagnosed with Panda virus; has to live in a plastic bubble
  • [EABF02] nominating Edna for Teacher Of The Year award
  • [FABF07] bonds with Lisa when Milhouse leaves
  • [FABF20] Turns his treehouse into a Playboy mansion {sb}

    Bart Treehouse Of Horror Segments

  • [7F04] I: Bad Dream House (Tells story)
  • [7F04] I: Hungry Are The Damned (Tells story)
  • [8F04] II: Bart's Nightmare
  • [9F04] III: Dial Z For Zombie (Tells story)
  • [1F04] IV: Bart Simpson's Dracula
  • [1F04] IV: Terror At 5&1/2 Feet
  • [2F03] V: Nightmare Cafeteria
  • [2F03] V: The Shinning
  • [3F04] VI: Nightmare On Evergreen Terrace
  • [4F02] VII: The Thing And I
  • [5F02] VIII: Fly Vs. Fly
  • [AABF01] IX: Terror Of Tiny Toon
  • [BABF01] X: Life's A Glitch, Then You Die
  • [BABF01] X: Desperately Xeeking Xena
  • [BABF21] XI: Scary Tales Can Come True
  • [CABF19] XII: Wiz Kids
  • [EABF21] XIV: Stop The World, I Want To Goof Off

Bart Ullman Shorts

Section contributed by Sam B

  • [MG03] Homer attempts to get Bart to jump into his arms without an unfortunate consequence.
  • [MG08] Homer throws Bart a football, which if Bart catches he will buy them all frosty chocolate milkshakes.
  • [MG12] Bart tries building a giant house of cards, but Lisa and Maggie keep on interrupting.
  • [MG15] When the girls are at the ballet Homer makes Bart dinner, but Bart is unimpressed.
  • [MG18] Bart is told to go get a haircut, but the barber does a terrible job.
  • [MG16] Bart tries to steal cookies from the jar, and pins the blame on Maggie.
  • [MG21] Bart is "out-skateboarded" by Maggie and Lisa.
  • [MG24] Bart goes swimming in a shark tank at the aquarium.
  • [MG26] Lisa and Maggie try to find a cure for Bart's hiccups.
  • [MG27] Lisa & Maggie feel guilty about stealing money from the savings jar, but Bart remains carefree.
  • [MG38] Bart makes his own TV show by getting inside the TV set.
  • [MG40] The kids try to get a sneak peek at their Christmas presents. Bart narrates the story.
  • [MG34] Bart is sent outside for some exercise, and along the way solves the mystery of a candy store robbery.
  • [MG041] When Homer and Marge tell the kids to clean up a messy room, Bart tells a story about Homer and Marge cleaning their own room.
  • [MG37] Bart takes his sisters to a Space Mutants movie, instead of the Happy Little Elves.
  • [MG31] Bart tries to shoplift candy from a shop, but is unsuccesful.
  • [MG44] Bart has a bathtime adventure.
  • [MG45] Bart has nightmares about cookies out to get him.
  • [MG46] Bart and his sisters swing around in the trees.

      Baring Butt

    • [MG24] Swims naked in a shark tank {sb}
    • [7G02] Runs to his room naked {ddg}
    • [7G07] Takes off his clothes while walking towards his bedroom
    • [7G10] Caught by Lisa as he bends over to take a picture of his butt
    • [7F11] When Homer calls him over for fatherly advice (erroneously expecting to be spanked)
    • [8F15] Takes photo of butt in mirror
    • [9F03] Offers butt to Homer for spanking
    • [9F13] Does an impression of Richard "I am not a butt" Nixon
    • [2F13] Moons the nation of Australia
    • [2F31] A slide of his butt, disguised as a map of Springfield, is displayed at a town meeting {je}
    • [2F32] Does an impression of "Dr. Cheeks" {je}
    • [5F02] Almost drops his "pantaloons" {je}
    • [5F08] Moons a shark along with Homer {je}
    • [BABF07] Butt inspected by Dr. Hibbert & trainee doctors {sb}
    • [EABF02] Photocopies his butt {sb}
    • [EABF15] Moons the field trip pupils at the aquarium {mj}
    • [FABF11] After Gina cuts his uniform {sb}
    • [FABF17] Moons the American flag {sb}

      Dressed Up

    • [MG14] At the funeral {sb}
    • [7G02] Going to the opera {dmf}
    • [7G07] At Sunday School {sb}
    • [7F13] At Sunday School {sb}
    • [8F01] At Lisa's essay contest {sj}
    • [8F03] Wears the suit Fat Tony bought him {sb}
    • [8F16] In church {jac}
    • [8F19] Prior to Homer going on the show {as}
    • [8F20] When Selma's new boyfriend (Sideshow Bob) comes to dinner {as}
    • [8F20] The wedding {as}
    • [8F18] When he sees "Oh! Streetcar" {as}
    • [9F01] At church [sb}
    • [9F06] Wears a tux in his fantasy Astaire-Rogers number with Laura Powers {bw}
    • [9F11] The funeral
    • [9F16] The cartoon awards ceremony {ddg}
    • [1F05] In church when Rev. Lovejoy plays "The Entertainer" {jac}
    • [1F11] On "Late Night with Conan O'Brien" {as}
    • [1F16] Burns' Heir audition {jac}
    • [1F19] In court vs. Freddy Quimby {jac}
    • [1F21] The wedding {as}
    • [2F04] In church; at Lovejoy house
    • [2F15] Most of the episode (as an adult)
    • [2F17] Wears purple suit after trying to amke himself taller {sb}
    • [2F31] When he is filming the "Eternal Struggle" {sb}
    • [3F01] While being "baptized" as a Flanders
    • [3F02] In church
    • [3F07] Going to the Try N Save {sb}
    • [3F11] At the country club
    • [3F16] In court {sb}
    • [4F06] Telling jokes on stage {sb}
    • [4F13] In church
    • [4F18] In church
    • [4F19] When Frank Grimes visits
    • [AABF06] In church {sb}
    • [AABF14] In church {sb}
    • [BABF06] At his performance {sb}
    • [BABF06] In church
    • [BABF10] At the funeral {sb}
    • [BABF18] at Otto's wedding {sb}
    • [CABF10] at Krusty's "Last" show {sb}
    • [CABF22] In church
    • [DABF02] In church {sb}
    • [DABF19] At Goldie's funeral {sb}

      Featuring Slingshot

    • [7G07] When Marge frisks him before going to church {sj}
    • [7F03] Teaches Martin how to fire one {je}
    • [7F21] Aims it at Milhouse when he thinks he's after "Radioactive Man #1" {je}
    • [8F01] When he lets one off at the pianist
    • [8F05] Has his slingshot on his desk {je}
    • [8F24] Seen in locker
    • [1F21] When Homer sneaks it off him {as}
    • [2F01] Fires a stink bomb at a man in an Itchy costume {je}
    • [2F04] In Sunday school; replica of the slingshot David used to slay Goliath
    • [2F11] Among the items Bart empties from his pockets {je}
    • [3F09] In his pocket when he talks to Mrs. Bush in her garden {je}
    • [3F10] Forgets how to use it while wearing a school uniform
    • [3F22] Lisa's new friends make fun of it: "Who does he think he is? Dennis the Menace?"
    • [4F06] Holding it in the "Sgt. Pepper" couch gag {je}
    • [4F20] "Beaver Bart" has one in the "Simpson Family Smile-Time Variety Hour" {je}
    • [BABF21] Carries one in the Munsters-parody opening

      Featuring Lucky Red Hat

    • [7G02] Pretty much featured throughout this episode
    • [7G05] Coughs it up after Nelson beats him up
    • [7G09] Loses his hat
    • [7G13] One of the French guys give it to Maurice the Donkey {sj}
    • [7F24] Causes Homer's shirts to turn pink
    • [8F03] Wears it on his way home from work {je}
    • [8F11] Attaches a flashlight to it on his way down the well {je}
    • [8F14] Mentions it
    • [8F22] His escape from Homer
    • [1F11] Many times; start of episode, box factory {jac}
    • [2F18] One of the newborn puppies gets put in it {je}
    • [2F22] Most of the episode
    • [4F10] Wears it in one of Homer's family photos {je}
    • [5F03] Grampa wears it {sb}


    • [7F20] Driving the car as a baby {sj}
    • [8F10] Born; lights Homer's tie on fire
    • [8F17] Of SLH and him together {as}
    • [9F08] Bart, age two
    • [1F18] Recalls dropping off a flaming bag at Skinner's door {je}
    • [2F05] Series of flashbacks of Bart and Lisa's relationship:
      • Bart lifts Lisa to the cookie jar
      • Bart puts on a finger-puppet show for Lisa
      • Lisa helps Bart bandage his knee after a skateboard accident
      • Bart gives Lisa his ice cream after she drops hers
    • [3G02] His first days of school
    • [EABF05 Stars as "Baby Stinkbreath" in commercial

      The Future/Career Paths

    • [7F02] Hep Cat Bart (after using the Demoxinil) {sj}
    • [7F03] Spending the rest of his life in the fourth grade
    • [8F15] Drifter
    • [8F21] Heavy-metal rocker
    • [9F03] Sleazy male stripper; Chief Justice of the Supreme Court {jac}
    • [9F18] Testing "Nature's Goodness" with 2-4 diethyl-propinmurinol {jac}
    • [1F19] Lifetime of hard labor in the cafeteria for playing "hooky"
    • [2F15] Working as a demolition man to work off his anger before law school (obvious reference to 9F03)
    • [3F05] "A lardo on workman's comp just like Dad;" washes himself with a rag on a stick
    • BABF13 An unsuccesful musician

      Featuring Skateboard

    • [MG23] Main focus throughout; title "Skateboarding" {sb}
    • [7G03] Blackboard Gag: "I will not skateboard in the halls" {je}
    • [7G07] The Tell-Tale Head
    • [7G13] Homer trips over it; falls down stairs {sj}
    • [7F06] The focus of this episode {jac}
    • [7F07] Maggie crawls past it on the staircase {je}
    • [7F10] Bart Gets Hit By A Car
    • [8F03] Bart The Murderer
    • [8F15] "No skateboarding in the halls" says Bart, the new hall monitor {je}
    • [9F12] Homer gives it to Pepe {je}
    • [9F22] Sideshow Bob has a tatoo of Bart's disembodied head on a skateboard {je}
    • [1F01] Homer trips over it and falls down the stairs {je}
    • [1F06] Bart and Milhouse go to the skateboard park during their Squishee Bender {je}
    • [1F07] Tries to skate in school, but his clumsy shoes make him fall over (see Bart Subplots) {je}
    • [1F15] Chases after Stampy on his skateboard {je}
    • [1F18] Skateboards by the laundromat, where he meets Skinner {je}
    • [2F04] Skates down huge hill with Jessica Lovejoy
    • [2F21] It's illegal for him to operate a Class Nine vehicle without pads and a helmet {je}
    • [2F22] Lemon of Troy
    • [3F02] He and Lisa purposely leave it in the hallway for Homer to trip on {je}
    • [3F09] Skates by George Bush's house; later skates into his garage {je}
    • [3F16] Bart's nemesis, Lester, rides a skateboard {je}
    • [3F18] Skateboards past a garbage can and throws gum in Lisa's hair; later appears for a second in the eyes of a bee {je}
    • [3F22] Shows off to Lisa's friends
    • [4F01] One of the items Nelson steals {je}
    • [5F13] Does some stunts at the MARS exhibit inside the Knowledgeum {je}
    • [5F15] Groundskeeper Willy confiscates it after a round of stunts lands Bart right into a freshly-raked pile of leaves {je}
    • [CABF14] Couch gag: Everybody skateboards off a ramp onto the couch (except Homer) {sb}
    • [CABF16] Rolls it down the stairs to Homer {sb}
    • [EABF05] Rides with Tony Hawk {sb}

      Bonding with Lisa

    • [7G06] Grudgingly admits he loves her
    • [7G12] Helps clear Krusty
    • [7F07] Apologizes at the end {ddg}
    • [7F08] Lisa teaches Bart how to play mini golf {dmf}
    • [8F02] Lets Lisa sleep in his bed {sb}
    • [8F05] Helps brings Krusty and his Father together
    • [9F02] Confesses to Lisa that he thinks she's not ugly {sj}
    • [1F22] Saves Lisa from Flanders' house
    • [2F02] Helps put Sideshow Bob back in prison
    • [2F04] They play "Cowboys and Native Americans"
    • [2F05] Competes with Lisa in pee-wee hockey; both put away their differences during the big game and bond; game tied (see Flashbacks)
    • [2F15] Most of the episode
    • [2F32] Buys Bleeding Gums album for Lisa
    • [3F02] Lisa gets Bart's "soul" back from the Comic Book Guy
    • [3F08] They play detective - once again - and thwart Sideshow Bob's evil scheme
    • [3F12] Helps get Krusty back into show business
    • [3F16] Helps get Chester J. Lampwick his $800 billion; clones Lester and Eliza then get Itchy and Scratchy back on the air, get Apu out of jail, and reunite Krusty with his estranged wife
    • [3F22] Gets Lisa's new friends to sign her yearbook
    • [4F10] They play in the snow
    • [4F14] They play detective again
    • [4F13] Apologizes for his antics when Lisa babysat him
    • [4F21] Helps Lisa through military school hazing; the only one on her side
    • [5F10] They save Krusty's career again
    • [5F18] The pair go digging for treasure, but find the alternative ending to Casblanca
    • [AABF03] recommends Lisa see Nelson in order to cheat on a test
    • [AABF07] They team up with other children to expose the secrets of their elders
    • [AABF16] Both working together at the retirement home; Bart forced, Lisa voluntarily
    • [BABF07] Work together to discover ulterior motives regarding Funzo
    • [BABF12] They together attempt to catch Maggie's balloon
    • [BABF13] A future Bart and Lisa eventually settle their differences
    • [BABF14] Bart and Lisa try to find the perfect photograph for the cover of the telephone book
    • [BABF18] Bart and Lisa work together on their movie projects; Lisa films the making of Bart's movie
    • [BABF21] Bart and Lisa, as Hansel and Gretel go through typical fairytales
    • [CABF06] Bart and Lisa rebel against Principal Skinner, along with others at Springfield Elementary
    • [CABF16] Bart and Lisa, jealous of Homer's attention towards other children, together expose him as a fraud
    • [CABF19] As wizards, both end the segment as friends after defeating Lord Montymort
    • [DABF06] Lisa reminds Bart why he wants Greta so much now that Milhouse has him
    • [DABF12] Bart and Lisa both roast Homer. (Not literally)
    • [DABF13] Lisa is Bart's manager while he works on Angry Dad
    • [DABF03] Bart and Lisa fight as Ganesh
    • [DABF15] Lisa understands Bart's isolation in the bubble; Bart lets her use the bubble to humiliate Skinner
    • [DABF20] Bart and Lisa rival each other, but later learn to work together as a team
    • [EABF05] Bart and Lisa watch the Baby Stinkbreath commercials together
    • [EABF11] Bart and Lisa cut the lights from Springfield's Power Plant
    • [EABF13] Bart helps Lisa rescue Clara after Lisa gives her false directions.
    • [EABF22] Bart and Lisa go on a sugar rampage in London
    • [FABF07] When Milhouse moves away he attempts to bond with her {sb}


    • [7G10] [$] Rearranges restaurant sign from "Cod Platter" to "Cold Pet Rat"
    • [7G13] Flushes the cherry bomb down the toilet {sj}
    • [7F04] Attempts to scare Lisa with a fake severed finger {sb}
    • [7F20] Rearranges party snacks to "Boy our party sucks" {jac}
    • [8F04] Loosens the top on Milhouse's salt shaker
    • [8F10] Lights Homer's tie on fire
    • [8F11] Tricks Flanders kids into giving cookies away {jac}
    • [8F11] Pretends to be Timmy (trapped in well) {jac}
    • [9F03] Pulls carpet up, writes "Bart" on carpet {jac}
    • [9F03] Plays with and later breaks Abe's false teeth {ms}
    • [9F08] Flushes Homer's wallet & keys down toilet {jac}
    • [9F08] Cuts all of baby Lisa's hair off {jac}
    • [9F18] Hurls giant tomato at Skinner's rear end. {mj}
    • [1F05] Deliberately falls asleep. Spits off sidewalk at cars. {mj}
    • [1F07] Paints extra lines on parking lot {jac}
    • [1F09] Tells a driver that the stream is shallow. {sb}
    • [1F11] Leaves box factory tour {jac}
    • [1F16] Pops heads off Mr. Burns' statues/floods his car {jac}
    • [1F16] Smashes Mr. Burns' windows {jac}
    • [1F20] Recounts throwing mail in sewer with Milhouse {jac}
    • [1F22] Snatches five bathing suits - all Martin's
    • [1F22] Gets Grandpa tarred and feathered
    • [1F17] Gets Milhouse's picture on "America's Most Wanted"
    • [1F17] His "Bartesque" scheme against Allison Taylor
    • [2F04] Falls for "Scotchtoberfest" sting
    • [2F11] Decorates Skinner's weather balloon in Skinner's image with message "Hi, I'm Big Butt Skinner."
    • [2F13] Makes a six-hour collect call to Australia
    • [2F19] Causes a teachers' strike
    • [2F22] Writes his name in concrete
    • [3F02] Hands out the "In a Gadda-Da-Vida" "hymn" at church
    • [3F09] Many pranks aimed at George Bush, most with Homer's help: glues a rainbow wig to his head, shoots bottle rockets at his house, etc.
    • [3F10] Wears a "Down With Homework" shirt, starting a riot at school
    • [3F18] Squirts ketchup and mustard at cars on the highway (with Milhouse)
    • [4F13] Many pranks aimed at babysitter Lisa:
      • fills his plate with lima beans
      • feeds Maggie coffee ice cream
      • orders a 25-foot Italian sub
      • tries to host an AA meeting
      • "uses non-violent resistance" when Lisa tries to drag him to bed
      • hires Krusty to perform at an "emergency bachelor party"
      • calls paramedics for "a Sisterectomy, a case of severe butt rot, and a leprechaun bite"
      • calls officials reporting that Lisa saw a UFO
      • calls a chauffeur for "the Ambassador from Ghana"
      • "goes to bread" when asked to go to bed
      • goes to the wrong bed
      • seriously injures himself
    • [4F21] Strings police bullhorns together, turns them all on, and makes noise, breaking every window in Springfield (sent to military school as punishment)
    • [4F23] Makes snack treats out of dog food
    • [3G02] Mocks Principal Skinner; his first prank. Makes flatulent noises, causing Milhouse to laugh. {mj}
    • [3G03] Tells Homer that he will take up smoking and then give it up. {sb}
    • [5F17] Glues joke-shop items to his face
    • [5F22] Shoots a mother sparrow
    • [AABF06] Escaped from church to break into cars. {mj}
    • [AABF12] Repeatedly clicks his pen to infuriate Lisa. {mj}
    • [AABF12] Pretends to be a murderer entering the house while Marge eavesdrops using Maggie's baby transmitter. {mj}
    • [AABF16] His comedy routine costs Springfield the Olympic games. {mj}
    • [AABF18] Swallows whatever is thrown to him. {mj}
    • [AABF22] Repeatedly yells "Fire" {mj}
    • [AABF22] Floods the school gym. {mj}
    • [AABF23] Hides oranges down his shorts.
    • [BABF04] Squirts thousands of dollars worth of Interferon in hospital. {mj}
    • [BABF04] Along with Homer, floods the house. {mj}
    • [BABF08] Rides a bicycle through the corridors of Burns' mansion. {mj}
    • [BABF10] Defaces Maude Flanders' funeral cake. {mj}
    • [BABF18] Tries to film up Lisa's nose, and Skinner urinating. {mj}
    • [BABF19] Pays people to kiss each other, namely Lenny and Carl. {mj}
    • [BABF20] Fools Homer into dialling the wrong area code. {mj}
    • [CABF03] With Homer performs various cons - bad parent, missing dog, BarMitzvah cake, retirement scandal. {mj}
    • [CABF06] Puts the urine bucket on Skinner's head. Leads rebellion. {mj}
    • [CABF12] Cheats in the marathon. {mj}
    • [CABF14] Uses fireworks to blow up gnomes. {mj}
    • [CABF17] As Tom Sawyer, performs various pranks with Nelson as Huckleberry Finn. {mj}
    • [CABF19] Replaces Lisa's magic wand with a Twizzler. {mj}
    • [CABF22] Joyrides Chief Wiggum's car. {mj}
    • [DABF01] Cheats at Monopoly, making hotels out of Lego. {mj}
    • [DABF06] Hecklers Skinner during his comedy routine. {mj}
    • [DABF13] Sets a trap for Homer using cactii, dirty diapers and a pool of green paint. {mj}
    • [DABF20] Desecrates Lisa's flag - Learn to Fart {mj}
    • [DABF18] Spins Milhouse on the roundabout, aided by Otto's bus.
    • [EABF02] Photocopies his bare bottom and includes it in the church bulletin
    • [EABF02] Commanded by Skinner to pretend that he is illiterate thanks to Mrs Krabappel.
    • [EABF02] Photocopies rear end and includes it in church bulletin
    • [EABF02] Pretends to be illiterate.
    • [EABF07] Creates several websites humiliating Skinner.
    • [EABF15] Moons the field trip pupils at the aquarium.
    • [EABF16] Creates havoc in Ned Flanders' house and shrine to The Beatles.

      Misc Tidbits

    • [7G13] Has a pet frog
    • [7F02] Informs Homer that he loves him while being strangled
    • [7F06] Confesses to Homer that he loves him when Homer was about to jump the gorge {ac}
    • [7F22] Allergies: butterscotch, imitation butterscotch, glow-in-the-dark monster makeup
    • [8F03] Learns how to mix drinks
    • [8F15] Fires a gun
    • [1F09] Fires a rifle {ddg}
    • [1F17] Reads "Bad Boy's Life" magazine
    • [1F22] Writes a play
    • [2F05] Has a pet turtle {mk}
    • [2F13] Pet frog appears {rg}
    • [AABF10] Wears the turkey as shorts {sb}
    • [CABF06] Wonders how old his permanent record, claiming "Underachiever and proud of it", is {sb}
    • [DABF19] Has a box full of guns {sb}
    • [FABF21] Loses his last baby tooth {sb}

      Ay Caramba! Count

    • [7G09] When he takes a peek inside The Ultimate Behemoth
    • [7G12] During Patty and Selma's slideshow {mj}
    • [8F07] Seeing Martin's soapbox car {as}
    • [8F08] Seeing Patty's legs unshaven {as}
    • [8F09] When he sees Marge's hair {as}
    • [8F14] When he sees Patty's (or is it Selma's) bra {ddg}
    • [8F16] When he sees Mrs K's photo and again when he see Mrs K's letter {as}
    • [8F20] When he hears that Sideshow Bob was trying to kill him {as}
    • [8F24] Gets the phrase tatooed on his chest {je}
    • [9F08] When he sees Homer and Marge snuggling {by}
    • [1F11] Just after Homer breaks the lamp {as}
    • [2F16] Tito Puente says it {je}
    • [5F14] Castro says it {je}
    • [EABF02] Bart 'dusts off this old chestnut'.

      El Barto Count

    • [7G03] The front steps of both Springfield Elementary and Town Hall
    • [7G10] The front steps of Springfield Elementary
    • [7F02] The wall outside wall of Moe's Tavern
    • [8F05] The front steps of Old Springfield Library
    • [9F06] The front steps of City Hall
    • [9F10] The wall of Springfield Town Hall
    • [1F09] The front steps of the Police station
    • [1F10] The wall of the Kwik-E-Mart
    • [5F04] Bart graffitis this in the couch gag
    • [5F13] Bart graffitis this in the couch gag
    • [BABF04] On the front of the fridge {sb}
    • [EABF16] Graffitiied in former Indian wasteground

      Get Bent Count

    • [7F08] To Todd Flanders
    • [8F12] Writes "Get Bent" on a piece of cardboard and holds it up to the fitting room security camera {by}
    • [8F22] When Milhouse asks if he and Samantha can still meet at the treehouse
    • [9F08] Tries to get Maggie to say it {ddg}

      Eat My Shorts Count

    • [7G02] To Martin
    • [8F03] To Fat Tony
    • [8F09] Fantasizes about writing it in the sky
    • [3G03] Sings it to Marge and Homer: "Might I add -- eat my shorts!" {bjr}
    • [3G02] To Principal Skinner for the first time (at age 5)

      Don't Have A Cow Count

    • [7G04] To Homer
    • [7G09] To Homer
    • [8F03] To Fat Tony and the gang
    • [3F22] Lisa says it; Bart claims it's his expression and she stole it {sb}
    • [4F12] To Lisa
    • [4F12] (Sung) "Step back Mom - it's Bart's turn now. Eat my shorts, don't have a cow."

      D'oh Count

    • [7G12] when Patty and Selma bring eight sets of slide carousels
    • [7F03] (in the future) when Bart Jr gets him in trouble with Ms Krabappel
    • [7F15] when Homer invites Principal Skinner over to dinner
    • [7F15] when he realises he still has a whole field of grass to sow
    • [7F14] when Lisa refuses to do his homework
    • [7F22] when asked to "do the right thing" by Marge
    • [8F03] when he sees that Lisa didn;t win the essay contest
    • [8F03] when it stops raining just as he reaches school late
    • [8F03] as he falls down the steps into Fat Tony's "Legitimate Businessman's Social Club"
    • [8F11] when he realises he has left a "Property Of Bart Simpson" sticker on his radio
    • [8F13] when Ralph picks major-league baseball players for his team
    • [8F22] when Milhouse and Samantha are kissing in the cinema
    • [9F06] when all he can say to Laura is "I fell on my bottom"
    • [9F14] when Lisa finds her science project immediately after Bart hides it
    • [9F16] when he loses to Lisa in a game of "Rock, Paper, Scissors" {je}
    • [1F06] simultaneously with Homer when Homer accepts his offer to go on the father-son rafting trip
    • [1F14] upon telling Homer that being a loser is genetic, then realizing {rd}
    • [1F17] Asks Skinner if his refrigerator is running; it isn't
    • [1F17] when the rubbish bin on his foot gets stuck in a hosepipe
    • [2F04] having to go to church whilst trying to avoid Jessica Lovejoy
    • [2F13] when he realises Lisa was right
    • [2F19] after his sarcastic comment about mopping the floor backfires {sb}
    • [3F16] When Chester Lampwick's film burns up {je}
    • [3F19] simultaneously with Grampa, after discovering the Flying Hellfish treasures were buried at sea
    • [4F16] when locked in the closet by the blind man
    • [5F03] when his ball rebounds into his face
    • [BABF20] when Homer, tries to trade his chloroform with a guard
    • [CABF03] when he is arrested
    • [DABF07] after the dog rips his clothes off
    • [DABF07] when the dogs returns and bites him

      Butt Pranks

      Section contributed by Sam B

    • [7F11] Bart's prank phone call ("Seymour Butts").
    • [8F02] Bart's prank phone call ("I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt").
    • [8F11] Bart placed a "Property of Bart Simpson" label on Homer's butt.
    • [9F14] Throws a giant tomato at Skinner's butt. {crct: ma}
    • [9F22] Bart tattoos "WIDE LOAD" on Homer's butt.
    • [5F21] When Homer's trying to think of inventions Bart's idea is a butt.

    {Ideas for new sections are warmly recieved}

    crct- correction
     sb - Sam B.
     ac - Alan Cantu
     as - Andrew Shaw
    bjr - Benjamin Robinson
     bw - Bucky Whaley
     by - Bob Yantosca
    ddg - Don Del Grande
    dmf - David Michael Friedman
    jac - James A. Cherry
     je - Jordan Eisenberg
     ma - Matt Awbrey
     mj - Martin James
     mk - Matthew Kurth
     ms - Matthew Snyder
     rd - Rick Diamant
     rg - Rebecca Gedalius
     sj - Stuart Jackson
     ss - Scott Sippel

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    Last modified on October 26th, 2008 by Wesley Mead (